In a nightgown in the middle of the dance floor,
our eyes accustomed to
the red glow of a cigarette.
Tenderly hysterical,
the crowd an assailant --
can I dance laughing,
get all I want?
Moaning, you project a single part
of our future, cut with
fires, sprawling eyes.
At the edge of the room,
a risk staggers, crosses your side.
In here, the mind is loose,
creeps into your details.
The first time you
made love you
wanted to die,
spirit rising,
a search party
harbouring weaknesses.
Tempt the essential,
the hell of a
dark grove.
Dense, your cry,
back up to the light,
correspond to the
legends of goodness,
a mournful way of life,
no luck, no quiet attention.
Go off, an exit disturbed,
a little lonely,
out of place.
Tell me what you're going to do:
The incredible potential almost a
declaration of fury.
Upon return, give luck an edge,
your charm a part
of our desperation.
I find the last remnants
of a connection in a low-rent version of
a harem room where the
song ends, begins again,
letting in more light.
Many things were blocked.
Now, mythos pops, scratches.
This is hard.
Ask now.
The mynah bird crashes, dark stains
on the wood.
Shut your eyes.
I see everything.
The wood holds many spirits.
Ask now and
be ready for the truth.
The owls won't see us.
I met the devil
in the form of fire,
a coward in the smoke.
I go to great lengths
to keep the ashes under control.
It takes its toll.
You're two days late
to burst into flames.
The mist is pressing in.
Bird call precaution,
mournful in the dark grove.
The first time you
made love you
wanted to die.
Go back up to the light.
There is an essential spirit rising;
search party confirmed.
Stunned to cry, you tempt weaknesses,
a nightmare, degrading the goodness
in the world.
Solitary, you judge what the photograph buries.
You're not afraid, not afraid.
Rise, start.
Now realize where we are:
a half circle where
the mood swings with a
slow sip of time.
A kiss, impulsive,
stricken with emerald.
I don't think you know
I left something hiding in there.
You really are good looking.
Become erratic, dead leather beauty.
This is different.
I've got my heart set on
reluctant poems,
a rush of lies between us
wandering. Restless spirit,
I feel it:
head cropped, surgical
instruction in the ways of love.
I don't want us to be like that.
The red drapes from my dreams, they
say too much, the truth, or a memory.
In the woods, a widening
we can't prove yet.
The less you know, the better.
Drunk now
I half expect
to turn up dead,
too many secrets
to rush into.
You be careful
arguing her name;
those are hard thoughts,
twice paranoid.
Worse things could happen
to get to the end
of your life.
Maybe the time
isn't right.
I know what's between the pages:
snapshots and
the biggest mistake
of your life.
A bite of flesh, direct contact,
I told you no one's seen
into the cradle.
Girl, the blood on that shirt is an
imaginary word of dust and
silver crosses,
my touch out of frame for days.
Tell me, is anybody looking for you?
I'm not too well, unraveling and
afraid to occupy my mind.
Through the walls we hear voices.
Can you capture the sound?
A blowing of nails into palms.
Haggard, I just feel I need
something sleepless, nitrous approval.
I've experienced nothing in
seasons of tending bar, grotesque
over the sound of men.
I captured paper dreams
at the Timber Falls Motel,
six black dots on a white surface,
unsettled message.
Division, blank talk defending
what I want.
Call me. There's enough for both of us.
I believed you were gifted.
A secret meeting in the woods, misguided.
Initials in blood,
the letter 'j',
a corridor of inquiry.
Crash; nervously smoking,
your connection strict,
a drug rundown
in the collar.
Lost, I was looking outside
to make luck.
I broke the beam of a flashlight
to catch a glimpse off limits,
the dead wrapped in plastic.
Enter one last chance:
I shouldn't have trusted
what you buried
in the clearing.
Maybe we should tell somebody
we were happy,
a long talk on possession,
visions all an act.
I keep thinking
I'm going but
I just can't get away.
Come over later
when spirits penetrate
the slow hour
at the end of an afternoon.
I can make the connection,
reach across death's void just by
thinking pale.
Eat the lotus;
the danger for you lurches
involuntarily in
uncomplicated strokes.
Come visit. Wish for more.
Speak to me
an old saying:
you're up against the
unsolveable.
stand on the paradox.
I wrote about the
names of birds,
the delicate practice
of singular joy.
Light comes through
from behind the poem.
I recognize the wound of
what you need.
It takes the strength of
four days to hide from
what was learned
early on.
Cut through to ground a concern;
there's no logic at work here,
too many secrets left around.
I was taught to go through
the older targets,
confident mystery a key to
calculated ammunition.
I can't explain how I've been feeling - so dumb, or
high-strung, but
it will say so
on the cards,
a slipped hint
through lack of preparation.
She had two visions:
grey on grey struggling
like an animal, a filthy portrait of
birds, unshaven morning.
From another part of the house, a tense whisper,
distant strains of a gentle hand, alarmed.
The mood a tundra, ghostwood dancing
on a cross:
Dance with me! Dance with me!
A snapshot, the way in.
Up north, our secret slow-burns,
an ice cube on bare skin,
all mine.
Open to
a long drag,
cigarette for effect.
You don't need to know
my spells are mild,
only to hold you.
Aid to the Beast,
cautiously incarnate,
this hiding place
is famished
for us.
What went wrong
with your life before?
I've got no right to ask
how long it will take us
to get to a vulnerable mystery
and you've got no reason
to believe me, my fortune a cigarette.
But I'll change, I swear.
We could run away east
to be a better idea,
to prove we are wild.
I didn't sleep too well last night.
Broken in half and
struggling towards visions connected to a
flashlight beam - don't fight it. For once in your life
you're exactly right,
gloved hand a red invitation.
With the flowing script of
plunging intuition I want to
seduce the new,
a reconstruction of the eyes addicted
in a dream.
Get a bit closer. I will go with you.
Watch that grave in the distance,
illumined as part of the always.
If the night's just right I
pretend I'm metal against Fate;
nothing ever touches me except
the casket's singing, teak and brass,
possess the body as it ceases.
Think of me as a friend
not destroyed by the headstone,
the view at ground level.
Hurt me:
every word manipulates
days like today.
Candlelight, a silent ear -
recite your
deepest fears,
mind a root.
Ask: you don't have to
be afraid. Submission is
part of the return.
In the distance, the dead.
Expand. You can almost hear
this last trembling.
Do you believe
in a dream
that wanders?
Full moon overhead,
mood a hiding place,
satisfied hesitation.
We don't know that
everything dies.
The day, sheer,
weakly revealing
the silk of
actions unnoticed.
To continue
into the spirit,
encourage trust.
Triumphant, the obvious words
right behind the hills -
something strange, out there,
the way we like it.
Personal mystery,
the mind a
mixed world, red light distance.
What it means, a breathless warning,
heavy with the answer.
Keep your prayers -
don't ruin this with
words, rushes of chaos
to descend upon the gravesite.
You killed
buzzing lips,
a growing sense of promise,
Convert to secrets
a long way
from the world,
the price we pay
for all the good things.
Seeking comfort
toward the grave,
I baptised distress,
impatient ambitions.
Blessed are the dead,
the Spirit with approval I
pray, call and response
nearly howls, died unto rage,
amen.
Play dead.
In the sunlight,
no ordinary resurrection:
now I feel like we're
really together.
Do you?
Jeans and a leather jacket,
this oration of a hole,
chain of mourners
spins and shifts. Hell prayers,
I am the hymnals, stunned to
sympathy, dark glasses.
We join, decent,
all this grief, to wait.
Reconstruction in
funeral blues
to ponder claw marks,
a kiss, his hands
a pale animal.
Small acids fragment
from her stomach,
arms bend back -
the body partially dissolved, heavy.
Transfer to the grave, freshly dug.
In the cemetery parking lot,
a faded black dress, manic,
fastened to the living.
Bind me:
this glare refuses
meaningful exchange,
ears achieving reluctance.
I used to acknowledge evidence,
a presence of feeling.
My wrists, out there,
embedded in an insult.
You turn it upside down sometimes,
a twine diary.
Enter: the way into the room is
too bright, but no matter.
Speechless, I carry on.
Embrace closure -
his hands, the gun,
hold on
for a beat.
Burying affection,
the good of
a bad thing
in ceremony,
leave will behind,
force wisdom
to the dead.
I don't know
how to stop,
afraid we'll
all be there together
without invitation.
I knew who she was.
Everybody did:
a couple questions,
a midnight violation,
bee stung lips -
a closer angle to
what you were looking for.
Syringe to her throat,
lush, a pleading beat.
So afraid,
undone.
After the funeral
white separates the high road,
mute at your door.
The body
a hard frailty,obstructing compassion.Careful you don't murder
this moment, unsophisticated.
Assent released,
a gesture inherent
to a measure of steel.
Let me tell you
about the dream I had
last night:
you were there to be broken,
impulses high,
a code waiting to become pictures.
I was old, couldn't stand
any longre.
Suddenly, a phone call;
one-armed neurons hushed to the end.
Do you know where dreams come from?
Mid-conversation,
the morgue,
a roving eye,
the good looks we choose,
a diversity in the forebrain,
the day,
unforeseen circumstances.
Guard your devotion.
Morning breaks out of her eyes,
collides with the
blushing slant in your handwriting.
You ask to leave;
under the door, a sip of approval.
Caressing the words, eager to tell,
it must mean something,
this connection.
Be careful; a name
unsure of its nature
indicates the far end of a heart,
identity close to north.
You may think I've gone
but I've got good news.
Make a wish:
twenty-five years later
I promise you a
red-draped room and
the correct words
for these sub-titles.
Filled with secrets
the shadow of a bird
passes above.
Sometimes
my arms bend back
and I feel like I know
something terrible.
Where we're from
a pretty song is
almost exactly like
sympathetic pain.
Dance around the table,
strange,
as oddly stilted
as your speech.
This dream is on your mouth.
You know who killed it now.
When two separate events
happen simultaneously
we must always pay strict attention to
the red thread of verification,
one chance out
between two worlds,
a sketch of futures past.
Wait till your turn
to sing over a circle of candles,
oh - I too have been touched
by fire, but when I saw the
face of God, I was changed,
a spell unseen.
See through this with me.
He moves over to her,
kneels,
takes a pill from a bottle,
drinks.
Silence rises,
slowly fighting
a dream that
distorted time.
The morning
shifts uneasily,
one way, then another,
one way, then another.
Draw the face
crouched in the corner,
vision intercut.
Woken, the air is troubled.
Can you feel it?
Stay, understand.
There's more to know
about memories, stitches.
Undressing a scream
out of the woods,
the hell dies away
from a clean house,
soaring primal.
Run. Run.
I will take care of it,
a background instinct.
Don't sleep, slumber;
something comes
off the speed of a long day,
hungry.
Gone for days,
headlights in a
stand of trees.
Leave something in there for me,
my brother,
hollow knot less than
what you owe.
Anticipate a
handsome aim,
never as much as
one would like.
The glove a switchblade,
wild as a girl.
Maybe someday we'll
sleep well, say goodnight with
a thing like that.
You don't know
what you've done,
teeth for a charm,
convinced of change.
Try not to show fear:
the weight of
this time of year
is a stranger,
funeral's joy.
The exertion of coma
don't get any easier;
correct it, discreetly.
You know
where to find me
when it's over.
I hear you're good at
what you do,
autopsy an all-nighter,
the morning scattered.
I wouldn't expect
anything less.
They're putting the girl
in the ground tomorrow,
her tongue a morgue,
door open, eye-to-eye.
Half the day's wasted
on our way
to be right
with you.
1990 - the hell,
I'm here,
ready to move off,
away from a catch,
false window
revealing things
about her
I didn't like:
shyly lucky,
how close you were,
my loneliness.
I didn't think
to take care.
Oh, I'd like to hear
I'm good,
really;
maybe my dad
will tell his story
about that.
Nobody's perfect,
my cigarette a tongue,
my crises a truth
none of them see.
Let me in, twenty minutes -
somebody might see me,
a shaking hand, hovering,
car parked in the woods.
Bend back,
keeping the bruised side hidden,
tenderly false.
If he finds out about us -
worse to speak, rending steel -
kill. I mean it.
Save it for me, baby.
I knew you'd be back,
highball grime and your
smoking tears.
You shouldn't have spoken that way,
those pains,
a stunned running engrossed,
chasing the bends.
You needed to change - your father...
Honey, it's right out here.
Shaking sick, please listen.
There's no reason to fade.
Sipping coffee
on the edge of generic,
every hour effortlessly untied,
strung glowing, a robin's egg
folded scarlet, new beginning.
Angrily elegant,
your iron gates an
envelope, silk ribbon flowing script,
the music we hear heavy, close.
The pines, towering,
a smaller opera each day.
Note the invitation, the promise.
White room, emerald smoke.
Exasperated, you pound, burst.
I'm not feeling too good, no; think I
got a touch of flu, bruise on the cheek -
fine, fine. I'm going to
erase this, connection pale, face unknown across
broken dishes, shards sweeping stiffly,
the need to rest, to be okay.
Next, my name over a place,
not a person, trash trying to sound normal.
I've got everything here I need;
don't drop by, okay? I'll always feel
like I have to be better.
He tries to move her.
She starts screaming.
When you say the name, secret boyfriend,
it strikes below, startles a bird
way above and
the routine repeats.
When there's no feeling
there's no sense
calling out
what did not break.
Following a dream I had
three years ago I
lay my hands on a line
drawn in chalk, explaining in
full-length a list to the deepest
levels, intuition on the
left side.
Move in on the fire,
desperately moaning, to dance -
stop, stop it - we have to sit uneasily,
recall infant spirit.
Concentrate on the 'J's.
I give the word.
Please read aloud
each of the names.
Hold this, a diary.
Get near me and I
will recall the
direct connection.
I died uneasily,
pursued on the edge of the bed,
restlessly searching.
Stay up late tonight,
pace, boots an impression
of the day I had a problem.
Maintain a watch on the music - it isn't
right, needle on the record,
tempo the heavy feel of despair.
The stylus, key to torment,
startled by another part of you.
Look again,
look again.
We have to dance.
Pay attention with
detached amusement,
reaction a death brag,
complexion bored.
Get acquainted, sweetheart,
the rough buzz of double scotch
an ideal of summer's darling.
The door swings open; register a
shake, the others already in the room,
worldly power, sensational.
Breathe, so long. Arrange this life,
easy without changing course.
Full moon feigned indifference,
illuminates no reason into tears.
Eat again, comforts in the cold surface,
roaring spite rapidly adding figures
to this placid thorn.
Black bourbon, pulsating eye, infra-red
destination - a neon sign possession,
detached reaction.
I just want to take it off.
